The D

I wont give up.

I don’t know why I’m still holding on for her. I’ve told myself many times to let go and just let her be but I can’t bring myself to do it. Subconsciously I think about her everyday she would always be here to talk with me about whatever, how we helped each other, every little thing reminds me of her. I’ve told my mind to let her go but no matter how hard I try to forget about her my heart holds on to her and wont let her go. Why is this? God please give me some kind of answer I need help.

Things I should have said…

I should have told her how beautiful she was. I should have told her how much she meant to me. I should have told her that would go through hell and back for her. I should have told her many things but i didn’t now she’s with someone who doesn’t deserve her.

Bestfriends

the-vandals:

Its funny the way it ended, I should have expected it all. The fact we were both running around behind your boyfriends back was never good, you had to hide me from him. I knew one day that he would say ‘It’s me or him’ but I pushed the thought aside, things were too good between us and I thought it would never end. You made me happy and to be honest you were one of the last things left that really did, I had no one else that I trusted more than you, you made me feel like nothing else mattered when I talked to you. I’ll be honest, I did get too close to you, but how could I have helped that? We talked every day, spent time together alot, it was like a relationship without the intimate bit and I didnt mind that one bit. But one night can change everything, when someone says to you ‘we need to talk’ it cant be good. But I didnt expect this, I got rid of all the bad thoughts from my head, thinking that you would have called if it was something serious. But you didnt, I got one text, one simple text that would change things forever. The day came where you had to make the choice, ‘me or him’ I read the first 3 words of the text and knew things were over. What makes it worse is that I didnt see it coming, maybe if I was prepared for this I would have been able to deal with it differently. But I didnt, it came at a time when things were perfect between us, which is why I still dont believe this all happened. I woke up this morning thinking that it would all just be a bad dream, and that I would look at my phone and see a good morning text from you. But it was all real..

But then again, maybe we werent bestfriends, maybe this was just me having feelings for you, and you needing a break from your boyfriend. Cause between bestfriends things just don’t end like this, or at least I dont believe they can.. You were everything to me, and now thats gone, well I have nothing really.. 

The ones who survive their walk in the desert, know what life is worth. They’re they only ones to trust, everyone else is sleepwalking.

the-vandals: